We are so fortunate to live in a state where we can express our views and not be tarred and feathered. Our valued freedom of speech is still protected by the United States Constitution. The Democratic Party, which I am glad to be part of, is inclusive and open to people (from all sides) participating in meaningful dialogue. My fear is that we are becoming a nation that is not engaged in listening and respecting different points of view. During this campaign season, all you have to do is turn on the television or scan social media posts to witness the divisiveness that exists in both parties. It’s hard to decipher the truths from the lies. The elders used to say, “You don’t know what you don’t know!” This is exactly what is happening today in local and national politics.

Candid discussions about how to resolve issues are just not happening. Those that seek to be elected are expected to serve all people, even the constituents that did not vote for them; to advocate for residents that don’t look like them; and to stand up and represent the community to the fullest. When people vote for a politician, they are saying that they trust that person’s judgment and discernment skills. We need more good and honest men and women to become politicians who serve their community in this way.

I am glad to live in Princeton where the local candidates do not engage in any of the negativity of name calling or outright verbal abuse from candidates running against them. I have witnessed on the county and state level verbal mudslinging that in my opinion makes the perpetrator look very small. Princeton has been lucky to have people running for office and discussing the issues vs. voicing disparaging remarks about the opposing candidate. It’s important to practice civility all the time. We must understand that words do matter. We also must understand that our children are very attentive and observe how we adults treat each other. We need to be extra careful to make sure we set the example and do and say what is fair and just so that they can one day lead with conviction. I personally feel that democracy is on trial. There is a thin line that is truly holding everything together. We, the people, need to continue to stress to our politicians that words matter. That civility matters. That what our children hear and see matter. I am hopeful that we can revert back from “the anything goes day” to a day when respect rules political discussions. Extending an olive branch to the other side and finding common ground advances negotiations better than blocking decisions and setting up roadblocks. I am still convinced that we (all political sides) have more in common than we do apart. Reaching out to the other side should be mandated for every elected official.  Playing hard ball and always saying “no” because you personally do not like another politician or political party should not be the determining factor for why laws and legislative bills are stalled and never adopted.

I served for over 15 years in local politics in Princeton. I served first as a Princeton Township Committeeman; and then, after consolidation, as a Princeton Councilman. There were many times when the governing body did not agree. There were times when the constituents did not agree with the governing body; but we worked together for the good of the town. We focused on the bigger picture. I remember one example that is so pertinent to today’s conversation. It dealt with where the new Princeton Public Library would be built. There were different viewpoints from officials from the then Princeton Township, Princeton Borough and from Princeton residents. Members of the Borough government were adamant that the library stayed in the Borough. Members of the Princeton Township government (which I was a part of) identified locations in the Township to build the new state of the art library. Princeton residents were similarly divided. I received dozens of emails and phone calls trying to persuade me one way or another. The approach that was used was well thought out and addressed many fears (including parking) voiced by our constituents. We (both governing bodies) listened to the constituents and to each other and were able to align on the current Witherspoon St. location.  To address the parking concern, residents were afforded two free hours of parking in the adjacent garage. We learned a lot about negotiations during this time, and we all are benefiting from a gem in our midst today.

I honestly believe that fear of the unknown causes crazy and irrational decision making. I would like to suggest something that politicians could participate in that would make them better decision makers. When I was on the Human Services Board, we participated in Study Circles. A study circle consists of people participating in discussions facilitated by a trained moderator. The discussions cover an array of personal topics that can include questions about your childhood, things you like to do, things that bother you, your greatest fears, your favorite things you like to do and many more questions. At the end of the study circle, people are so much more enlightened and informed about the people within their circle. We all are made up of our past and how we have perceived things. Until the curtain is pulled back and we are vulnerable, it is difficult to change our perception of a situation. How wonderful would it be if politicians see situations through the lens of their constituents? I am convinced by doing this soul-searching intervention, all politicians would be better decision makers.

I understand it is easy to stand outside and throw stones. I have been inside and had to dodge some of those stones. But we are so grateful to have great local politicians that are willing (most times) to listen and do what is best for our wonderful community of Princeton.